An Open Letter to a Diamond in a Rough

Dr. Tate's African American studies class is where we met.

Our group project is where we became acquainted, you actually nominated me to be the group leader (I'ma kick yo ass for that)

Our exes caused us to become friends (remember those nights at the loft?)

And our journey showed us why we became the best of friends.

I don't think I could have asked for a better best friend.  You're my sister and apart of my life forever.  We're in business together and we're planning our lives with each other in mind, so hunny yo ass is stuck!!!

Today, you graduate from the hell hole we call college.  Man we had some great times, and there were times we leaned on each other for comfort and support.  These last 6 years have been a blessing because you were there as the friend you are, and now I want to show you how effing proud I am of you, you did it girl!!!!  So today, we celebrate you, the generous, caring, giving, PHENOMENAL person you are, and we toast to the endeavors we know you have planned for your future.

Now, you may cry some more.....

Blogger Insight: Yep I've Been Blacklisted-Choosing Authenticity Over Opportunity

Tuh, I never thought I would consider myself "blacklisted", and all from an innocent post.  Yes, myself and my old brand technically were blacklisted because we didn't want to conform to what we were told to do.

This is the post that started it all...and the post I'm writing now will probably start it again (I honestly don't give two shits).  But, my post "Everyone Can't be a Fashion Blogger...Get Over It" was simply a post of me venting my distaste for fake ass bloggers.  By this time I already knew I wanted this blog to be considered a business and I experienced the great amount of work it took to produce a high quality blog brand.  I frankly didn't appreciate how ugly ass thots would come on IG, hashtag what they wore and considered themselves bloggers....no ma'am.

And while I try to respect everyone's opinions, something didn't sit well with me.  Someone, who will remain anonymous but...you can figure out by clicking on the post, stated how she felt blog and job shouldn't be synonymous.  That's fine, but....this person was the founder and leader of a influencer group I was apart of responsible for giving bloggers well...hope of turning their blogs into businesses, so for her to say that...kind of pissed me off.

So, I did a video response, actually two, and allowed who was a contributor at that time to post a written response.  

 

In her written response my contributor, who now is the third part of this brand (funny how shit works eh?) simply copied and pasted the comment and stated her reaction, no harm done right?  WRONG!

We were attacked to say the least.  Not only were we contacted by this person's ass kissing minions on how we disrespected a leader in this industry, there was also a LOOOONG email thread on how I should be ashamed of allowing someone to contribute such a post, how her words were taken out of context (which they weren't), how I needed to think about my future in this industry, and basically being reprimanded like I was a fucking child.

At the end of this exhausting convo I was given a choice, to either take down the post and issue a formal apology or let it stand...you can read between the lines on what decision I made.

I will never, ever, ever ever ever, be bullied into making a decision because I told the truth about something.  What bothers me the most is someone in this position would even dare to try and conduct herself in this manner!!!  Now if I wanted to stoop to her level I could release not only incriminating evidence of her character, but just a funny ass video of her crying, but no, I'm not going to do that, as much as I am petty (Phi Gamma Petty founding soror) I am still professional.

Over the course of several months, I've seen opportunities come and go that I know would have been given to me if I would have complied.  At first, it made me sad, mad, and confused as hell, and then I realized this wouldn't be happening if I wasn't a force to be reckoned with.  So, I began to pat myself on the back, and continue putting in them hours and redevelop how I wanted this brand to be seen as.

In this industry, your authenticity is what you have to hold on to.  Fuck the free shit, fuck being a "celebrity" on the Internet.  I've never kissed ass to get to where I am and I won't start now.  My hard work and determination is what is going to make this brand stand out, it might be a longer process, but I know it will pay off.

There is one thing, however, I thank this whole debacle for.  It inspired us to re-brand into who we are today.  This situation showed me how over saturated the blogging industry is, the fashion industry is, the FASHION BLOGGING industry is, and that take all of that and throw it into a small ass city better known as Saint Louis.  The "popular" bloggers are all fashion bloggers.  We wanted to shy away from that and prove a point.  We wanted to prove you don't have to be a fashion blogger to be successful, or have any niche at that, which is why we're one of the only purposely branded nicheless blogs on the market.

Would I change the situation? No.  Would I change my response?  Yes, only because now with the work that I do as a PR rep, I would have stated how I felt in a more mature manner.  Would I have complied?  FUCK NO!  If I don't have anything else to show for what I have contributed to this blog, I know I have my character and my authenticity.  And at the end of the day, that's all that matters...or should matter.

Blogger Insight: Ummmm I'm Still a Fulltime Blogger! (+TWO FREE Printables!)

What in the entire f*** is up with this whole "I quit my job and NOW I'm a full time blogger" trend?

I mean I get it,  It is INSPIRING nonetheless to see people be able to quit their 9-5 jobs and turn what people don't even consider as a career into 6-8 figures worth of shove it in your face.  But...I'm not there yet and I don't know if I would ever want to quit my job entirely.

Let's just make one thing clear, you don't have to quit your job in order to be a full time blogger.  If anything, many of us are clocking in those hours at 2 full time jobs.

Have you ever sat down and thought about the hours you REALLY put in when it comes to blogging? I bet it's way more than you think. Do you find yourself:

editing posts
adding keywords
prepping your post for SEO optimization
adding labels
adding a search description
adding alt tags
taking original photos or finding quality stock photos
editing photos
fixing HTML/CSS issues
watermarking photos
saving photos for SEO optimization
sharing your post via social media
networking online through blogging groups
networking offline at blogging events
prepping future posts
YouTube videos
podcast episodes
AND MANY EFFING MORE!

Then you most definitely qualify as a full time blogger, with much overtime put in!  If striving to be your own boss and taking charge of your destiny is what you hope to do, please let me be the first to commend you, but that doesn't mean the rest of us don't put in the same amount of work as you do.

And some of us don't want to quit their current jobs.  I personally love the work I do, hate the company, but love the work.  If I can find the exact same position with a company I love...I don't think I will quit to become a full time blogger.  Another factor is, many of us have people that depend on us, such as children.  As much as these "experts" try to promise thousands of dollars within a few months, blogging is so uncertain, especially in your beginning years.  One month you can have 5 sponsorships, 3 ads running, and a few partnerships, and the next....not a damn thing.  So for us parents, especially single parents like myself...we have to make sure home is taken care of first and sometimes blogging doesn't make that feasible.

Don't worry, we'll all get there.  Slowly but surely people are starting to recognize the work we do is actually...work, quality work that many people are realize they need as apart of their marketing efforts, just don't think you have to quit everything cold turkey just to be considered serious in this industry.

And to help you along in your blogging journey, we have not one, but TWO free printables for you this week!  Our first printable is a blogger time sheet (very appropriate for this post) which not only helps you keep track of the hours you put in on a particular blog post, campaign, or blog project, but it can also help in pricing for your free lance work.  Our second printable is a blog task checklist packet.  From blog posts, to social media and various other tasks, keep them in order and check them off once completed!  Both of these printables are totally FREE, all you have to do is join our exclusive blogger studio to gain access to these printables and many more!

How many have taken the plunge of quitting their 9-5 and focusing on blogging?  How many juggle both?  Who's on the fence?  Comment below and sound off!

Beauty: Only Skin Deep

The old saying of "beauty is only skin deep" still rings true to this day.

Like the next beauty lover, I have tons of foundation, eye shadow, etc., and all of the most expensive and latest cosmetics on the market.

At the end of the day, all of that means nothing if you don't take care of your skin underneath.

Your skin is your canvas, and the way you take care of it shows underneath your makeup. 

Think about it this way, to have bomb makeup, my canvas must be clear.

Now I'm not saying you must have the clearest skin in order for you to have "good skin", but you should strive to take care of it on a regular basis.

Here are some products that I use on a regular basis in order to keep my skin as close to perfection as possible.

Peter Thomas Roth

Cucumber De-Tox Foaming Cleanser 

What it is formulated to do:

Gentle foaming cleanser with cucumber extract detoxifies skin of environmental pollutants, purifies, calms, and soothes irritated skin. Sugarcane helps support natural cell turnover to soften skin, leaving skin soothed, hydrated, and radiant. 

My Review

This does exactly what it states. Not only does it work but its super gentle on the skin, good for all skin types ( I'm oily like Crisco, so trust me i know). Now it doesn't have alcohol but the pump makes it so it has a foam release so it's easier to work into your skin. I highly recommend this to anyone looking for a new day-to-day cleanse.

Lancome

Advanced Genifique: Youth Activating Concentrate

What it is formulated to do:

Gentle foaming cleanser with cucumber extract detoxifies skin of environmental pollutants, purifies, calms, and soothes irritated skin. Sugarcane helps support natural cell turnover to soften skin, leaving skin soothed, hydrated, and radiant. 

My Review

The real deal ya'll! This is a serum that actually makes you look younger in a week. I use this along with my moisturizer for a more youthful glow. A definite in my beauty routine.

Fresh

Soy Face Cleanser

What it is:
A bestselling, do-it-all cleanser and makeup remover that whisks away impurities without stripping the skin of essential moisture.

My Review

Absolutely soft soothing to the skin, which is why I love it. This is great to use right after you take your makeup off and helps remove the leftover access of makeup that might have been left behind. 

Rose Face Mask

What it is:
A cult-favorite hydrating and toning gel mask that’s infused with real rose petals, pure rosewater, and a smart algae that delivers optimum moisture. 

My Review

One of the most soothing masks I've ever used. whats makes it so much better are the rose petals infused with it. Leaves your face feeling moisturized and highly refreshed.

Lancome

Energie De Vie: The Smoothing & Glow Boosting Liquid Moisturizer 

What it is:

An energizing antioxidant liquid moisturizer that refreshes, protects, and hydrates tired skin for an instant dewy glow. 

My Review

My favorite moisturizer to date. I have crazy oily skin and even still this works on my face like a charm. Its formulated like a serum so its lightweight and doesn't leave a sticky feeling behind. I love to pair this with my Genifique.

Clinique

Clinique Smart System-Repair Serum

What it is:

A powerful, multitalented serum that visibly improves wrinkles, evens skintone, lifts, and brightens for skin that looks firm, fresh, and youthful-looking. 

My Review

In all actuality, I really do enjoy this. I received this a few days ago & noticed that it actually does make a difference with my makeup application. Not only does it smooth out my uneven tones, but it makes an awesome base for your foundation to glide over creating a flawless airbrushed look.

These are some of the products that currently rule my skin routine and I see no end in sight. If you try any of these products please feel free to let me know how they worked for you! 

Happy Shopping!!

Fashion & Style: Inside the Mind of House Ov Beeombi!

I told yall we had that heat, and it's here!  We sat down with the one and only Derron Cherry, better known as House Ov Beeombi for an in depth exclusive interview!  Don't know who House Ov Beeombi is?  Well if you're a fan of Selma, and The Haves and Have Nots, then you know of his work as he was the costume designer for those Tyler Perry productions!  We were able to sit down, catch a cup of tea, and get the scoop after a SUCCESSFUL debut of his collection as the first show in Saint Louis Fashion Week 2016!

Blogger Insight: The Beginning....(BBU-STL Meet Up!)

So, it happened.  We finally had our first Black Bloggers United Saint Louis Meetup!

You guys do not understand how much this not only meant to me, but meant to everyone who attended.  Being in Saint Louis where over the past few years, our city has been labeled one of the most dangerous cities in the US, you see how the city you once loved has turned upside down.  Being the creatives that we are, this is our outlet not only to distract us from what happens in our city multiple times a day, but also to be that voice of our city in order to make a change.

Being a black creative can be hard, and in many instances there isn't a place to come together to network and mingle with like minded individuals, especially in Saint Louis.  That was one of the reasons why I decided to become the Regional Director of Black Bloggers United for Saint Louis, I knew we needed a change.

When I tell you it felt AMAZING to just converse with what already feels like family on issues no one else would know about, both blogging and cultural issues alike.  We are already building a community which I can feel will grow bigger than anyone of us could dream, and that makes me too amped!!!!

If you weren't able to join us for this meet up, don't fret, it's was the first of MANY meet ups and workshops to come.  We will have a workshop in December geared towards monetizing by collabing with brands locally and nationally (stay tuned for details) and, we have our #BBUPowerHour this weekend!

6 cities, 6 places for you to come and join us!  For those of you who will be joining me in Saint Louis, we will be meeting at Coffee Cartel (CWE) at 12pm.  I STRONGLY encourage anyone who is coming to bring their laptops, tablets, planners, notebooks, business cards, cameras, and whatever else you need!  I will probably stay afterwards if anyone wants to do a few pictures in the CWE that you can use on your site!

Make sure to check out Black Bloggers United and see what we're all about, and to RSVP for the power hour, just click here!

See you all then!

*photo credt: J. Harris Photography (@jharris_photography)